Blog, heartbreak goodbye, Love

Is Marriage an Achievement? The Real Answer, Finally!

“Whosoever said marriage is not an achievement, didn’t have a good one. Good Marriages are an Achievement.”
– Moffat Machingura

When your business is bad you can’t call your business an achievement, but when it succeeds you call it the best achievement of your life. That’s the same with marriage. Only when it’s not working can you say it’s not an achievement.

… And that would be true since you have every day mishaps to prove it. However it will be only true for you but not true for the concept called marriage altogether. You have a truth but not the truth.

But I Understand Why You Say That…

1. There is More to Life…
You don’t want to grow up, get married, grow old and die. You believe there is more to life – and you believe none of it compares to marriage. There is some truth in your beliefs – but not totally…

A teaspoon of lies can ruin your life far much more than a bucket of truth could build it.

The worst lie is not the one that you hear from others, but one that you tell yourself. And the most difficult lie, is one that has an element of truth in it.

Read on, you will get more…

2. You Are Late…

Probably your biological clock is ticking and everybody you meet keeps popping up that irritating question “Hey when are you getting married?” It follows you everywhere – whether at church or at the mall “Hmm by the way you are married now right?”

You want to shout “It’s none of your business!!!” But you say, “or not yet haha” Pretending to be polite. You go home and ask yourself “But why me – why isn’t it yet?”

“When you can’t get something that you want badly, you find ways to make wanting it seem bad!
– Moffat Machingura

So you just tell yourself – “anyway marriage is not achievement.”

But Whats Wrong with That?

1. You Are Decreasing Your Chances of Finding a Good One

There are successful women who look at their success in career and business, and thank their husbands for it. There are some who wished to flap their wings and fly, but had husbands who believing in chaining them to the ground…

“When you find the right person love is paradise, but when you find the wrong one love is pain.”
– Moffat Machingura | How I Kissed Heartbreak Goodbye

That’s a quote from one of my books How I Kissed Heartbreak Goodbye


The more you believe marriage is nothing, the less effort and wisdom you will apply in getting a good one.

Hence you multiply your chances of getting a bad one.

2. You Cant’ Keep What You Don’t Value

“Devaluing someone doesn’t take away their value, it only takes away your opportunity to extract value from them.”
– Moffat Machingura

The same goes for good marriages…

Marriage doesn’t just happen – it takes commitment, sacrifice and a whole of maturity. If you don’t value marriage, you can get it but can’t keep it. You can’t even extract the best from it.

Let’s Correct This…

1. Marriage is an Achievement But it’s Not the Only One

“It’s good for a girl to think marriage is an achievement, the problem is when she thinks it is the only achievement she was born to make.”
– Moffat Machingura

Yes getting married is an Achievement! The problem is some girls make it the only achievement they aim for in life. Aim for other achievements as well – have a career, business or political leadership!

Change the world, be an inventor!

Just don’t deny that getting married, to a good person with the right principles of keeping a good marriage running – is also something worth cherishing and enjoying.

2. Failure to Get Married Is NOT Failure in Life

… Otherwise all Nuns, Monks and Priests would be called failures too – and so would be Jesus, Mother Theresa or Isaac Newton.

Even if you are not married, marriage is still an achievement. Only that it’s an achievement you haven’t yet made. Just like winning Olympics is an achievement you haven’t yet made (and might never want to make).

The truth is your life can go on pretty well without it – we can’t deny that – (just as much as not winning Olympics is not ending your life in anyway right now, neither is it making you any miserable).

So Marriage is An Achievement – but it’s not forced – and it’s not like life is bad without it – you can always find other achievements that make you happy.

3. Money Is Also NOT the Only Achievement in Life

In my book Journey to the Center I write that,

To a beggar on the streets money is everything, but ask a millionaire who has just signed divorce papers, he will tell you money can’t buy you love.

Psychological Studies show that at the end of your life what will matter to you the most is not how much money you made or how many hours you spent at the office – what will matter the most is who came into your life, who left and who stayed.

It’s a material world, but you are a social being. Your soul flourishes in intimacy, and it flounders in isolation.

Go On – Live, Laugh and Love

Be honest with yourself: If you were to find a good person, and together you go through the hardwork of building a happy home and famiIy; Looking back at the end of your life – would you say that was nothing? 

What do you think? Write your comment below

12 thoughts on “Is Marriage an Achievement? The Real Answer, Finally!

  1. “When you find the right person love is paradise, but when you find the wrong one love is pain….” this quote makes me cry tho it’s true. I really appreciate your teachings Sir.

    Yeees let’s change the world.. …let’s be inventors

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