LIAM: The problem is that my girlfriend doesn’t trust me anymore because I once cheated on her.
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How can I convince my loved one that I’m not a player after an incident which portrayed me being one? How can I rebuild the trust again?
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Will we be as happy as we were before?
Hi Liam. You can’t talk your way out of a situation you behaved yourself into.
You behaved yourself into distrust; you have to behave yourself into being trusted again. You will have to continuously stay faithful for a long time before she can trust you again.
Otherwise, the fact that she is still with you shows that she loves you, and she is willing to trust you again even though that could take time for her.
Another tip is to talk openly about the cheating when you are with her. Sometimes just look at her straight in the eyes, laugh, and tell her,
“Do you know what made me laugh? I remembered how angry you got that day when you found out I was cheating.”
She might remain silent, or she may respond angrily – whatever the answer, just assure her “Nah, nothing is worth making you feel that way.”
Deep inside she will feel much better. Be casual about it, and talk about it anytime.
If she asks “but why really did you do it?” say you were silly, or that you were young and foolish.
Say it was a foolish moment of weaknesses that you learnt from, and assure her it won’t happen again. You have learnt your lesson and she is not worth the pain you inflicted.
Asking for a last chance also helps. Tell her you are a changed man and you are asking her to trust you one last time.
Tell her if it happens again, this time she will have a right to never trust you no matter what you say or do.
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